Do You Have to Love Your Job?

by Tracy Handler, Career Coach
Do You Have to Love Your Job - picture
This Valentine’s Day, I thought I’d share my thoughts on a relationship I’m fairly certain Hallmark doesn’t address: our relationship with our job. To start, I googled “do what you love” to see what came up. There were over 12 billion results, the first 3 of which were How To Do What You Love For A Living from Business News Daily, Why You Shouldn’t “Do What You Love” from Psychology Today, and How to Identify and Pursue Your Passions from The Muse. Clearly, I’m not the only person to consider this topic.

I read those three articles and agreed the most with Psychology Today, but not because the author actually argued that one shouldn’t do what one loves. She argued – I think correctly – that setting the bar at “do what you love” is unnecessary, potentially unrealistic, and in some cases, counterproductive.

If you are in a position to do what you love – you have found a passion that translates into a job, you live in a geographic location where that job exists, you have the skills and qualifications to get that job, the job provides the financial resources you need and/or want, and the job comes with an employer and colleagues who feed your passion – then by all means, go for it. Hopefully, most of us get to experience that at least once in our careers. For some, though, it’s just not attainable, or even desirable.

Here are some reasons why.

First, we all have different internal and external motivators. Loving our job may very well not be one of them. As career coaches, my colleagues and I have done formal and informal assessments with countless numbers of professionals, helping identify what drives them at work. Some are primarily motivated by money, some by contributing to a greater good, some by having time after work to pursue hobbies or other interests, and all by a combination of variables. So, we can be motivated and satisfied at work without loving what we do.

Second, some people don’t have a passion when it comes to work. The question “what are you passionate about?” can be overwhelming to these people and lead them to think something is wrong if they can’t find one. It can also lead to stagnation: “Well, I need to find what I really love before I…” This, by the way, is what Stanford professors Bill Burnett and Dave Evans refer to as a "dysfunctional thought" in their book, Designing Your Life.

Third, some have a passion that doesn’t translate into a marketable skill, employment that actually pays the bills, or a job they would love. I worked with a student who loved chemical engineering – really loved it – but couldn’t work in it because the work involved potential danger to other people. That pressure made her too uncomfortable. I worked with another student who had a real passion for food and wine, and I don’t mean eating and drinking. He loved the art and science of food and wine, but he had no desire to work in related industries. He wanted to love food and wine in his own way and on his own time.

At this point, if you are thinking my answer to “Do you have to love your job?” is no, you are correct. Is it a worthy goal? Maybe. Absolutely necessary? No.

When working with someone who is trying to figure out what they want to do, the questions I like to ask are:
  • What role do you want work to play in your life?
  • What factors need to be present for you to be satisfied at work?
  • What boxes have to be checked?
There is so much content out there around “do what you love,” but in all of my years career coaching, I haven’t had anyone say to me, “I have to love my job.” Like? Yes. Love? No.

This Valentine’s Day, if you’re setting the bar at loving your job and finding that you’re falling short, consider changing the bar. We’ll help you.

Happy Valentine’s Day.